National Poetry Month

     We are halfway through National Poetry month.  What a great thing to celebrate.  I was reading about how poets usually can't make a living from writing poetry.  They usually have to find other ways to support themselves.  These days members of quite a few professions need to find other ways to support themselves.  I would love to be able to write short stories and poetry for the ten hours I spend on my day job, but it isn't likely that I ever will.  I would love to have time to work on a novel. I am a little afraid to start anything new, because I have so much going on that I'm having a hard time keeping up with myself already.  I am working on the Friendship Quilt and that will take a long time, because I only have so much time to work on it.  I feel like poetry and short stories are where my mind is right now.  While they do take effort and revision and time to age, I feel that they aren't as daunting as the thought of writing a full on novel.  I might not have the attention span for such a large undertaking, at least not right now.  I am leaning toward writing some combination of poetry and short stories for the each of the quilters and tying it all together with the quilt.  Without having a direct line to the actual events at the time of the making of the quilt, it would be nearly impossible to write anything truthful about the group as a whole.  I haven't given up on the search, but all the information I have received so far has included "I had not heard of the quilt until I read your article/I got your letter etc."
     So the search is still on for a living member of the quilting group so I can get the full scoop.  I am still excited about the project and have already started writing a few tidbits and have a good first draft of a poem down on paper.
     Next week is Holy Week, so I will be busy at church.  I may not get a whole lot of writing done, but I'll try to fit some in here and there.  Get out there and read some poetry for National Poetry Month.   I hear that Shel Silverstein has a new book of poetry out called "Every Thing On It."  I can't wait to read it.

Write, Write, Write!

     I am way behind on my "poem a week" adventure, but I worked on the Snow White poem for the Enchanted  Conversations site.  I think I finally got it.  I'll have to go back and see if it makes any sense today, but that is what it's all about.  At least I have it down on paper.  I have some time left to tweak it.  Snow White poetry submissions are due between Wednesday, May 11 and Saturday, May 14.  After Snow White, it will be on to Cinderella.  It is nice to have a topic and a deadline to work with, even if I don't get it published in enchantedconversation.com.  Maybe there will be a better place for it, like another contest or a book of my own poetry.
     I don't know that I will try to make up my missing poems, but I am going to try to get back to a normal schedule.  I feel quality is better than quantity, but if I don't have a goal, it can't be accomplished.
     I started another short story this week.  There are contests all over the place.  I need to pick one so that I have a goal date to finish this story, otherwise it may just end up half-written mess in one of my many notebooks.  I am sure I could always go back to it, but I do like to finish something every once in a while.  This might be a good time considering that there are so many contests coming up.

I love my computer!

     I have a love/hate relationship with my computer.  I love how fast it can do things that would take me days to accomplish.  I love that I can contact someone and they can read my message at their leisure, not when I call them in the middle of something.  I also love being able to look at emails when I have time.  It seems I'm always busy when someone calls.  They think that I am screening and don't want to talk to them.  Not true.  Well, okay I do screen, but not to decide if I want to talk to someone.  If I don't recognize the number, I assume that it is someone trying to sell me something or asking for money.  Hate that.  I also figure that if it is truly important, they will leave a message.  That is what voice mail is for, isn't it?
     What do I hate about computers? Well, how about when my computer tells me that its virus protection is turned off, and to 'click here' to fix the problem.  When I 'click here,' it doesn't tell me how to turn it back on or any other useful information that will help me fix it.  It is just some dead-end, or they try to sell me something like a higher level of protection.  'Cause obviously mine isn't good enough.  How is it that my virus protection tells me that it is checking my email attachments and that they do not contain any threats if the virus protection is actually turned off.  Kinda makes you wonder.  I think therefor I am.  I scan therefor I am on. I don' t know.
     My husband threatens to throw my laptop out the window.  It is at least 5 years old and it is pretty banged up.  It won't hold charge and we have to wrap the cord around the computer and keep it tight with just the right amount of tension at just the right angle to get it to charge in the first place.  When the pink light comes on, you must back away carefully, because any movement of the surrounding table, chair or floor in the immediate vicinity of the computer could tank the whole operation.  When the light turns blue, you should have about an hour and a half to work on it, but lately the battery light is not a true representation of how much power actually remains.
     I should be getting a new laptop sometime this year.  I sure do miss being able to write on the computer and not have to sit at a desk at all times.  I don't know how long I have with the desk top computer I am working on now either.  My brother-in-law has raised it from the dead at least once already.  Thanks Bro.
     Here's something to put on my pet peeves tab.  Why is it that as soon as you get used to using a computer program, they have to change it?  It isn't always better to change things.  No matter when I buy my next computer or what model I buy, it will be obsolete the second I leave the store.  In some cases, probably before my credit card has cleared for payment. UGGGHHH!

Open Mic Night...Scary

     I received a bulk invitation, meaning everyone is welcome, to an open mic night.  We are invited to share poetry, prose and music.  I am not a public speaker.  I don't know that I want to be.  Maybe it is because I don't think that I have anything worth sharing, but I think it is more because I don't like to speak in front of groups.  Maybe those are really the same reason.  That makes me think I should go and do it just to break the fear.  Then my fear makes excuses why I don't have time.  Anyway, I think there are enough opportunities to do "open mic,"  I see them all the time.  I think it is something that I need to work up to.
       I think I need a shot of self-esteem.  Does anyone know where I can get one of those?  It is kind of like a money tree I guess.  It takes hard work to get money.  It takes lots of "Just Do It" to earn self-esteem.  Why is it that no matter how much you are praised or complimented for something you just can't see the value in your work or yourself?  Is it that way for everyone?  Those people who get up in front of crowds and sing, dance, speak or play sports, what have they got that I ain't got?  Dorothy, Tin Man and Scarecrow would say, "Courage!"
     Is that something you are born with or something that is cultivated as you grow?  I know that I don't have it, but I don't know why.  I don't remember being discouraged or put down by anyone who really mattered to me.  Everyone is picked on in school to some degree.  You grow up and get over it eventually.  My kids have it, but I don't know where they got it from really.  If it's genetic, then it wasn't from me unless it skipped a generation.  It must be their daddy's fault.  I can usually blame him for most things.  Sometimes, I even blame him for the good stuff.
     Open mic night?  Probably not this time.  I really do have other plans.  It's tonight and I just got the invite this morning.  Maybe I can work myself up for the next one.

Is "enjoying" the right word?

     My posts have been much shorter lately.  Probably because I am very busy.  I am still in Religious Education Mania.  I am coming up with some fun things to help get the students interested.  At least I hope they will think that they are fun.  I just never know.  Things that I think are fun turn out to not really be fun.  Then the things that I fear are too "young" or "immature" they have a blast doing.  I guess that is okay as long as they are learning what they need to learn.  Maybe they enjoy the simplicity of the more child oriented games because they are tired and want to relax a bit.  I can't have them sleeping in class though.  

     Teachers who challenge get more out of their students, but what if the students don't really feel that they need to be there?  It feels like if we try to challenge them too much, they just won't show up.  There has to be an overlap between fun and learning that I can use to get them interested.  

     I went to the Stations of the Cross/Communion Service again last night.  I am really enjoying it.  Well, I don't know if enjoying is the proper word, but I am getting a lot out of it.  Our Deacon's homilies focus on the actual events that took place during the Passion.  It gets very graphic and a little gory, but I think it is necessary for us to really understand what Jesus went through.  The things that we think are problems or annoyances have nothing on what this guy actually went through.  It all seems very neat and clean in the pictures of the stations.  I have a feeling it was anything but clean in real life.  I feel that it is good that we are reminded of this at least once a year.  I wish more people would come to the Stations.  It is really moving.  I think that people would feel very differently about what is going on in their lives if they were reminded of what was given up for them.  Things given up not just by Jesus, but by others who give of their time, talents, and especially lives.  I keep praying that more people will realize how important it is to have faith.  We need to look a little deeper than our everyday lives, all the things that keep us too busy to have a relationship with God.  After all, we only have these lives because of Him.

Getting Healthy

     I joined myfitnesspal.com today.  My childhood best friend hooked me up via facebook post.  I figured why not.  I have lost about 10 pounds since I quit drinking last May.  I am almost to my one year anniversary.  I have been trying to be healthy, but the hectic lifestyle doesn't help.  Myfitnesspal.com tracks your eating and exercise and gives you a huge number of people to bond with.  We can all encourage each other.  Exercise is more fun when you have a partner and a little encouragement.
     I have a break from 1:30 to 3:30 this afternoon, so I thought I 'd take the dog for a walk.  I could use one myself.  It looks beautiful outside and the thermometer says it is at least 40 degrees.  I bet it feels better than that in the sun.  I better charge up my MP3 player, in case the silence is too deafening.  That can happen you know.
  

Remember to Vote!

     Tensions run high on the eve of the spring elections.  I have my own opinions on politics, but it is so hard to  see where candidates really stand.  I am so sick of the ads on TV.  Imagine all the money spent on political advertising going to feed the hungry or house the homeless.  I have a deep scotoma every time a political ad comes on, I just block it out. When I do pay attention I get so frustrated.  You can't tell who is telling the truth, I start to feel like they are all crooks.  By Wednesday there will be the beginning of advertising for candidates for whatever election comes next.  It never ends.  I, for one, will be voting tomorrow.  I hope that you will too.  Remind everyone you know that it is up to them to take the initiative.  If we don't utilize our right to vote, it could be the next thing they take away.

"Hey, this table has a wood grain top!"

     My dining room table is the catch-all at our house.  The mess is mostly mine, but it does contain papers that the girls bring home from school.  Papers that I have to deal with.   Sports, band, dance, school stuff it's all there.  Then after I get through the school stuff, I reach "my stuff."  This category contains a pile of papers that have to do with religious education, decorating committee, writing contests or assignments, half written poems and short stories, receipts, old sections of the Compass (our local Catholic newspaper), coupons that I cut out but never used, junk mail.  Well, you get the point.  If I have ever thought about it, it's in the pile.
     About once a week, I make a well-intentioned attempt to tackle the pile.  First, I start by putting everything into their respective smaller piles.  Second, I throw out anything that is outdated or unnecessary.  Now, it is a more organized mess.  Third, I get distracted by something like my job, my kids coming home, it doesn't take much. Next, I start to make dinner and when I go to set the table I remember that I was "tackling the pile."  The food is almost ready to put on the table, so the smaller piles get stacked into one big pile and pushed off to the end of the table to sit and begin its multiplication process again.
     Sometimes, maybe quarterly, I actually get the whole pile put away.  Anyone within earshot knows that I have completed my mission because they hear something like, "Hey, this table has a wood grain top!"