I was going to write about online scams, but it went in a different direction.

     Every once in a while I look for a "better job."  I do have it pretty good now.  I get to stay home, lounge around eating chocolate and watching soaps all day.  No, not really, I'm kidding.  Seriously, I don't have any gas expenses really.  I don't need a fancy wardrobe or pretty shoes.  They just get spit up on anyway.  I have my weekends off and I'm home when my kids get home from school.  I know that my clients/families appreciate what I do.  When I think of getting another job, I feel bad that I will have to tell them.  I will be doing this for a few more years though, we just bought a new swing set.
     So I try to keep writing and working on my book, hoping that someday the opportunity that I am waiting  for will come up.  The opportunity that will allow me to move on from this to something a little less like diapers, spit up, and the occasional outright vomit.  It would be nice to not work ten hour shifts and be able to go to my children's sporting and other events without ripping apart my entire schedule.  If I take off, I don't get paid.  That's life, I know.
     I looked in the paper yesterday and saw that a new lodge was opening.  It has a hotel, restaurant, banquet hall, etc.  So I thought back to all the time I spent in food service and housekeeping, and all the time I spent doing correspondence courses in Hotel & Restaurant Management and Catering & Gourmet Cooking and Business Management.  The owners of the lodge were advertising a job fair.  They need to hire at every level.  My heart filled up, thinking that this could be my way out.  Then I remembered that we just spent almost a thousand dollars on a swing set for the business.  I also thought about all the gas and the clothes that I would have to spend money on to have a job like the one I would have applied for at the lodge.  Dreams crushed?  I don't know.  I have pretty much moved on from that part of my life.  Still, the mind wanders there from time to time.
     I enjoy my writing and I am comfortable here for now.  I am still looking forward to that opportunity.  It will come.  I will be ready.
    

The Stations of the Cross

     Every Tuesday in Lent, our church prays the Stations of the Cross and has a communion service or Mass afterwards.  I have made it to all of them so far.  The girls have gone twice.  My husband even got there once.  The homilies have been pretty graphic, but the girls handle them pretty well.
     When I hear what Jesus went through, I feel that we are all pretty selfish if we can't even make it to a nice warm, comfortable church for Stations in Lent, let alone a Mass on Sunday.  Giving up meat on Fridays in Lent doesn't seem too hard either.  We Catholics have made that really easy, Friday Fish Fry!  It hardly seems like a hardship to go out for fish every Friday in Lent.  I guess we try to make the best of things.
     I am probably preaching to the choir, but I feel that even those of us who do make a point of getting to church, volunteer and use our God-given time and talents for good, still have a long way to go.  I am blessed with a healthy family and we have two good jobs to help us provide for it.  Still, sometimes I feel that we are way too far from God with our attitudes and our priorities.  I can't imagine what it would be like to never go to church or to pray.  There are many times in a day when I can say, "I got this."  There are also many times in a day when I have to say, "This one is yours big guy."
     I have Religious Education Mania right now.  I am trying to get lesson plans done for next year.  I hope I have this kind of focus when it actually comes time to teach again.   I am alway looking for fun ways to teach this stuff.  Maybe fun isn't even the right word, but I do need something for each lesson that will keep them awake and interested long enough for some of it to sink in.  I am working on a website for the High School RE program.  I am trying to use technology, what little of it I understand, to try to connect to the students.  Wish me luck.

Slow This Thing Down, I Wanna Get Off!

     Did you ever have one of those days where you feel like you are running all day, and then at the end you don't feel as if you have accomplished anything?  Well, that was all last week for me.
     The week started out at turbo speed.  I think I must be misdiagnosed.  I know that I have depression, but I think I can be manic too.  There are times when I can't keep up with my own brain.  My heart pounds as if it is coming out of my chest and the creative juices flow so fast that you can't collect them.  That was Monday and Tuesday.
     Wednesday I caught some weird sort of bug that makes you feel nauseous.  You try to lay there as still as you can trying to fend off the urge to run to the bathroom with the bucket in your hand.  It all started with a killer headache, I was thinking was a migraine.  I usually don't get that nauseous with my migraines.  Wednesday and Thursday were full of that joy.  It really kicked my butt, migraine or not.  I was completely useless.   It was a good thing that the hubby and the kids helped to pick up the slack.
     Friday I woke up feeling better, thank God.  I was still tired, but at least I wasn't wondering where my bucket was at all times.
     Do you remember being on the merry-go-round in the park when you were little?  I remember spinning so fast that things blurred.  That was Saturday and Sunday.
     So here we are on Monday, and it is spring break for the girls.  This week looks as if it will be a little more tame.  I'm glad.

The Importance of Music and Sports

     Wow, what a weekend!  It was a busy one, but I feel good about all the time I spent on good things for my kids.  Solo & Ensemble was great.  My daughter got a first on her oboe solo.  She reminded me that it was only a class C.  I told her that she can pick something in a higher class next year.  She is still in middle school, so she isn't competing for State anyway.  Her tutor, a high school senior, got a few starred firsts.  That means he's going to State.  We got to watch him play his English Horn solo, she's right, he is amazing.  I love to see her so excited about music.  She's determined to play the English Horn too.  I told her that it is a logical progression.
     We also worked concessions for a camping and outdoor show at Quietwoods RV Sales and Service, to raise money for the softball team.  The shift we had was slow, but we had a good time anyway.  Then Sunday afternoon was softball practice for my younger daughter.  She seems to enjoy it.  We are off to buy a batting helmet and a bat.  Boy, sports and music are expensive.  The girls are worth it.  They are well rounded and will probably never be able to take a side in the sports/music debate.
     I had an interesting conversation with one of the Solo & Ensemble judges.  We were discussing the importance of music and sports.  They are both team events for the most part.  They both require learning and practicing.  Timing is very important as well.  At our school, the students do find ways to participate in music and sports, but I don't think that is the case everywhere.  They are both extremely important parts of a good education.

Happy St. Patrick's Day

     I used to have a St. Patrick prayer card floating around in here.  He would stare at me while I typed.  I wanted to share the prayer that was on it.  It is called St. Patrick's Breastplate.  I shared it with my Religious Education students last year around this time.
     Instead, I give you an Irish Blessing:  May the road rise up to meet you, may the wind be ever at your back.  May the sun shine warm upon your face and the rain fall softly on your fields.  And until we meet again, may God hold you in the hollow of his hand.  God Bless.

    

No Enchanted Conversations For Me

     I heard, over the weekend, that Enchanted Conversations will not be using my Rumpelstiltskin poem in this issue.  I am okay with it, now I can enter it in a poetry contest.  I have read stories about how even some of the most well known writers received hundreds of refusals before finally being published.  Bring it on, let's get that part out of the way.  I still can't wait to see what 10 pieces they are using.  I'll have to wait until the 20th, that's the day this issue should be ready.
     I have already started working on the Snow White Poem for the next issue.  Published or not, I'm having fun. Having a subject and a deadline can be very motivating.  I am still working at my 'poem a week' experiment, and I'm still a little behind schedule.  April is coming, I wonder if the Starving Writer will be having a poetry contest again for National Poetry Month.  I guess I need to get through March first.  I had a lot of fun doing that last year, probably because I wasn't focused on winning.  I think I'll try to do it again this year, just for fun.  Laura from The Starving Writer suggested that I put a picture of myself with my poetry book on this site.  That was a few months ago.  I haven't gotten to it yet, but one of these days when I actually put on make-up and do my hair, maybe I'll remember to have some take a picture for me.  It all comes from procrastinating too much.
    

Mom, He Has Ashes Too!

     Wow, am I a slacker.  Ash Wednesday was last week.  Oh well.  We all went to church on Ash Wednesday.  I love watching the little kids as they watch the priest put ashes on our foreheads.  They have such looks on their faces.  I would love to know what they are thinking.
     When we got home from church, we checked the basketball scores on ESPN, I think, and there was a sportscaster sitting there at the desk with an ashen cross on his forehead.  This struck me as odd and cool.  First, odd, because I have never seen anyone on TV with ashes on their foreheads.  Maybe I've never watched TV on Ash Wednesday, I don't know.  The girls noticed it too, and one of them pointed it out, just as I noticed it.  Second, cool, because TV is all about image and beauty and make-up, yes even on the male sportscasters.  I wish I knew who the guy was, because I would like to thank him for showing his true colors.  What a good role model for those who are Catholics or some other denomination of Christian and have a hard time showing it.  We could use a few more role models like him.  The way some people hide their religion, you wonder if they think they'd be stoned if anyone knew they believed in something.
     It seems that the media is always looking for dirt, I'm glad that our favorites celebs don't give them any to find.  We really love NBA Cares and all the positive things that the Packers and other NFL teams are doing as well.
     I want to give a big thank you to those sport and other high profile personalities who make it known that they believe in God.  I love that you realize that your talent is God given and that you aren't afraid to thank him  for it.  Thank you for keeping your noses clean and being positive role models for our children.
    

Ash Wedensday

     Today is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent.  We have mass at 6:15 pm, and I hope to see my religious education students there tonight.  We are getting hit with a snow storm right now, and should get a couple inches of accumulation. Hopefully that doesn't deter people from going to church. I really have had enough of winter and I hope that this is the last snow we get.
     I ordered religious education textbooks for the girls yesterday.  I have been teaching them at home as opposed to them going to class at church on Wednesday night.  I am a teacher, so I figured that I could just teach them at home.  It is actually cheaper for me to by the books than it is for me to send both of them to classes.  I have to admit it is hard to keep a consistently scheduled time to have our classes, but I believe that the way we live is as much of a lesson as going to class.  The kids should be learning at least that much at home anyway.  We are focusing on the classes during the summer.  The girls have so much going on during the school year.  We do have good discussions sometimes after mass, and the girls do ask good questions.  Sometimes they surprise me with what they have picked up.
     We have decided to pray a few Rosaries together as a family throughout Lent.  Our church also prays the Stations of the Cross with a Communion service to follow every Tuesday in Lent.  We will be attending those as well.
     There is a lot of talk about what should be given up for Lent.  I always have a hard time trying to pick something.  My daughters are giving up sweets for Lent, I don't eat a whole lot of sweets to begin with.  My husband is going on a diet, trying to cut back on everything.  We are supposed to be fasting, so I guess he's on the right track.  I quit smoking and drinking, and I'm not giving up my one or two diet cokes a day. Maybe I could give up that silly game on my phone that I waste so much time and battery on.  Okay, I can do that.  Imagine all the other stuff I can get done.  Maybe I'll say a Hail Mary every time I think about playing that game, then I'd get some extra prayers in too.

Fat Tuesday

     Today is Fat Tuesday or Mardi Gras as they like to call it in the South, and in France, I would imagine.  So today is the day that we act like gluttonous monsters so that we can fast for Lent.  Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, we have mass at 6:15.  School is still having Jazz Band practice and regularly scheduled Wednesday meetings, and probably lots of other things that I am not involved with.  It is too bad that we cannot schedule around Ash Wednesday.  The schools used to know that Wednesday was Religious Education night.  They didn't schedule extracurriculars on Wednesdays, but I guess we have come so far away from God that we just don't care anymore.  They all love getting off of school for Good Friday and Christmas Eve, but where are they the rest of the year?
     I love all the opportunities that my kids have at school, but enough is enough.  My daughter, who loves math, decided not to be on the Math Team this year.  She said that she needed a break.  She scored higher than 92 percent of the 7th graders in the state on her WKCE test.  I am sure the Math Team would have loved to have her, but I understand why she didn't do it.  You can only be in so many places at once.  She is working very hard this month on her Solo and Ensemble pieces.  She is doing a solo on the oboe, a woodwind trio piece with a flute and clarinet, again she is the oboe, and she is doing a oboe and flute quartet (three flutes and herself).  She is also performing with the Jazz band, playing the clarinet.  It is perfect timing, between basketball and track.  Solo and Ensemble at our school is on Saturday, March 19, so she has two weeks left to practice.  She put on a little concert for us last night.  She is sounding great.  She has a high school senior tutoring her on the oboe.  She has another lesson today.  He is going to UW Eau Claire, I think, for music.  He is going to need teaching hours, so he is teaching my daughter and another oboe player from eighth grade.  He is an amazing musician, we are lucky to have him.  Last week, they broke down her music to show her where and how to breath.  That is a huge help.  He told her it would take time to get used to it, but it would come with practice.  I wonder what she'll learn today.

Poetry Experiment Not A Failure Yet

     I haven't exactly been keeping up with my 'poem a week' experiment.  I am probably about three weeks behind. I did write the Rumpelstiltskin poem and a poem about the quilt popped into my head at about 11:30 one night.  I stayed up for an hour to get it out of my head.  I figured that I wouldn't sleep until I got it out anyway.  My mom calls it 'monkey mind,'  I prefer 'monkey brain.'  There's another one for my 'glossary' tab.  Monkey brain is when you are trying to sleep and your brain has a tornado of ideas blowing around (or just one really big one), and you won't sleep until they are out.   If you do sleep, you risk losing all those ideas by morning.  I have also started that poem about Snow White for the next issue of Enchanted Conversation.  I haven't heard anything yet, about Rumpelstiltskin, but they have a lot of reading to do.
     I have been thinking a lot about how to approach the quilt book.  I could write a short story about each quilter.  It might be called a work of semi-fiction.  Using whatever information I am able to collect, I could write a story that tries to capture the personality of each quilter.  I was thinking about a chapter for each quilter, but I don't want to just spew out their birth dates and other vitals.  I am receiving wonderful stories and may be able to re-tell some of them.  Maybe the urge to write poetry will strike, that does happen to me from time to time.  The book should have structure, but at these early stages, I am open to all sorts of creative avenues.  If each quilter has their own chapter, maybe each chapter can contain different features.  I guess it all depends on what information I am able to collect.  I am hoping to have pictures of each quilter, past and closer to present.  I would like to incorporate the quilt as much as possible, into the stories.  This may be difficult, since none of the families had ever heard of the quilt, until now.  It is possible that there may still be quilters who are alive and ready to share.  I sure hope so.

Missoula Week

     My younger daughter is participating in Missoula this week.  It is amazing what that group can do in just a week.  Actually, they had less than a week.  Usually there are two performances on Saturday.  This year they are performing this afternoon, for the 4K-5 graders, and then on Saturday evening, for the public.  My daughter is playing a fairy in a very interesting version of Sleeping Beauty.  I can't wait to see the whole thing.  She is enjoying herself very much, but it is a long week.  I am glad that the teachers did not decide to pile on the homework.  It amazes me, how comfortable she is on stage.  My other daughter would prefer to be in the pit, and I would be scared to death to even try it.  They are amazing girls, and I am glad that they aren't afraid to succeed.  They don't seem to have a problem trying new things and they don't shy away from anything unless it is because they just aren't interested.
     Softball and track are the new sports this year.  I am not a big fan of baseball, but I do enjoy watching kids play.  I like that it keeps them active.  I understand baseball, basketball and even soccer, but I was never involved in track.  It will be a new adventure.

I Am Not Worthy

     I am feeling today, like if I don't have something worth writing about, I shouldn't write today.  Who gets to decide if what I'm writing is or isn't worthy of being written.  I guess that would have to be me.
     We are getting ready to wrap up our year for Religious Education.  We have Ash Wednesday Mass and one class left.  Well, really we have two classes left, but one of them is more like a fun night.  We are going to play review games and have pizza.  I think it will be fun.
     Next year I think I may be teaching alone.  The couple who have been helping have decided that this was to be their last year.  We are supposed to have about twenty-four students.  Lately, we have had only 6 to 7 attending class.  I should be able to handle that myself.  I think that part of our attendance issue has to do with the forming of our Youth  Ministry group.  The students were given the choice between coming to class or joining the youth ministry.  We lost eight to ten people because of that choice.  I have nothing against the Youth Ministry, in fact I helped get it started, and I really do like our Youth Minister too.  We have worked very hard to recreate the high school religious ed. program.  It was formerly taught by our pastor, who kept everything in his head.  When he became ill and suddenly had to retire, we scrambled through bumpy roads trying to create a curriculum.  We incorporated our youth ministry training and we try to make the classes interesting and fun.  Some topics are pretty dry, they are hard to make fun, but we try our darnedest.  We have a great textbook, it has six chapters.  We cover two chapters a year.  We are just finishing the second year.  So, our juniors will not have had the entire book, but they have learned a couple of things I hope.
     Next year I get to teach the sacraments.  I am kind of excited.  I am frustrated though, when we show up all ready to teach a class and only 6 students show up.  Those kids deserve a class, but I am not sure they want one.  They would love to just be sent home, but they stay and stare off into nowhere.  I think the cooperation is getting better, they seem to be getting used to me and I am much more calm, less nervous.  Every class is an adventure.  Every class is a new challenge to get them to open up.  I am excited about teaching, but I also get frustrated with the attendance.  I really do appreciate those who do come to class and participate.  They definitely keep me on my toes.